Guerdon

“But without faith it is impossible to please Him: for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6).”

The other day, I’d say it was about two weeks ago, I asked Jesus to increase my love for Him. I forgot the words ipsissima verba, but it was something along those lines. I knew that there was more (there’s always more) I could be doing for Him and more ways I could be encountering and knowing Him. I didn’t sense any near conviction nor any real pressing natural need. But there was this still, small voice that ensured I wouldn’t forget to ask this simple question. The Holy Spirit! Perhaps it was worded thus: Jesus, please help me to see You more. Please help me to know you better. I walk around with this understanding that I’ll be getting to know my Savior better and better as eternity continues to unfold but rarely do I really request an audience so as to petition Him for a deeper initiation into His love and mysteries and person. And so I asked.

“When Thou saidst, seek ye my face; my heart said unto Thee, Thy face, Lord, will I seek (Psalm 27:8).”

I attended a different church about five years ago. Er, I had been attending a different church five years ago (that’s better) and one of the things that had arisen out of “the assembling of myself together (Hebrews 10:25)” with my brothers and sisters of that fold was my friendship with the worship leader. About six months prior to relocating to a different church, one in the town to which I would move and that I now call home, he changed up the setlist for Sunday mornings. Nothin' wrong with that at all. “Sing to the Lord a new song (Isaiah 42:10a),” and all that. However, I had begun to miss the hymns I’d become accustomed to singing before the message. I felt the absence in my mind that was filled with those hymns and their simple hooks and choruses. I love music and will sing any and everything I can to the Lord. My playlists tend more toward the secular and I have a strong sense of reappropriation when it comes to the music of the world. If something sounds amazing and the lyrics can in turn be used to worship the Father (or the Son, or the Holy Ghost), then I’ll turn it around. None of the songs in my two top-ten playlists are from the Worship section. The ones featured shed light on my life and way of thinking that no other track has touched in quite the same way. But again, I would rather have more than twenty songs to jam out to and so I was yearning to complete my catalog with those aforementioned worship tracks.

“And it will come to pass, that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking I will hear (Isaiah 65:24).”

Last Friday, I was driving home on the freeway and about halfway there I decided to turn on the radio. I usually listen to my phone but instead wanted some silence. With nothing on FM, I selected the AM band and the familiar words to “Mighty to Save” came floating in to my car. More old-fashioned than I’d have liked and different than my friend used to do it, it nonetheless sparked my memory. Jesus had just reminded me of one of those worship songs I’d been silently longing for in my spirit. And after searching around on Spotify for a version more to my taste (Laura Story’s is pretty good, I gotta tell ya), I came to the realization that Jesus also answered my prayer, the one I touched on in the first paragraph.

This is the point of all life. To know Jesus better and better. And even if He answered my prayer to know Him better, He even went one further and showed me through this song and indeed the whole story, just how much He loves me.

“Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen (Ephesians 3:20-21).”

It’s my prayer for you.

Nephology